Act 2, Scene 3: For her Enjoyment

DIALOG

Marketplace Ambience

Ril'odur: "Hello! I'm Ril'odur from the Shan'eno Herald. I'm working on an article on the agricultural developments in our city during the last few years. Would you perhaps have a few minutes to answer some questions for me?"

Zel'madon: "Sure. Whaddayawannaknow?"

Ril'odur: "So, how did you become an Eggplant seller?"

Zel'madon: "I learned the craft from my father. I'm from a family with a long eggplant selling tradition, you know!"

Ril'odur: "A-ha. So, in layman's terms, why should one visit a specialized eggplant salesmen instead of any of the more general produce merchants?"

Zel'madon: "See, the most important part of selling eggplants is the individual consultation. Eggplants come in all kinds of shapes, sizes, and textures, and I can help pick just the right one for you."

Ril'odur: "Oh, I see. So, if I wanted to have some eggplant tonight, what would you recommend for me?"

Zel'madon: "Just you alone?"

Ril'odur: "The whole family."

Zel'madon: "Oh. OH! Well, don't worry, I don't judge. Oh, in this case, I'd recommend a half dozen of these ... an especially versatile breed, we call it the Van'osian 8 incher."

Ril'odur: "Anything else I nee to know?"

Zel'madon: "Eggplants are very modest vegetables, add just a bit of olive oil, and you're good to go."

Ril'odur: "No salt, no pepper?"

Zel'madon: "Oh! Yeah, of course you can also cook them, just make sure you clean them very thoroughly. Oh, excuse me for a moment (turns around), sorry, ma'am? You want to do ... what? Ah! Yeah, that's totally fine, but maybe pick one of those with more of a flared base, that'll be a lot safer! Sure, you're welcome! (turns back) Where were we?"

Ril'odur: "Uhm ... alright, eh, so, seeing that your family is still in business, I assume your survived the rat plague pandemic well?"

Zel'madon: "Very well in fact, despite having to switch to mail order only."

Ril'odur: "So staying at home made people really hungry for eggplants?"

Zel'madon: "Hah! I guess that is one way of putting it. Hang on (turns around). Yes, sir? No, they're fresh. The texture is intentional. Ribbed for her enjoyment. Get it? Sure! You're welcome. (turns back) Sorry for that, but customers always come first."

Ril'odur: "Okay, so is there anything else you'd like to tell me?"

Zel'madon: "I know some really good eggplant jokes."

Ril'odur: "*sigh* Okay, but only one please."

Zel'madon: "Why did the eggplant turn red?"

Ril'odur: "You tell me."

Zel'madon: "It saw the salad dressing! *giggles* Get it? The salad ... dressing."

Ril'odur: "Uhm yes, I think I've got everything I wanted to know, thanks for your time and have a nice day!"

Zel'madon: "Why did the eggplant never overtake the tomato? Because it couldn't ketchup ... HAHAHHA! ketch up ... get it? Hahhhaha? So good ... so good ... Hey ... where did the guy go? Oh well ..."